Make a List

I was living with my boyfriend’s parents a few years back, well, more like twenty years back, And what I took away from the experience other than an awkward time was writing lists. His dad would write daily and weekly lists, and he kept to them religiously. He would cross off each item as he accomplished it. The lists were lengthy. But he always got what he needed done and still had time for his ritual evening filled with football and beer.

I had noticed his ritual, yet I didn’t give birth to it until about 15 years later. I decided to go back to college. I was a year into it and overwhelmed, too many things to do and not enough time. One night as I sat wired from espresso scrambling to finish a final paper I remembered the lists from the boyfriend’s father. I started making a list for homework — when to do it, when it was due. The list grew adding work, finding apartment, study groups, coffee breaks, etc.

Now I live by my list. I have a list for goals — present and future, a list for daily and weekly activities ranging from house cleaning to reading, writing, groceries, dance class. You name it, it is on my list. I place a box next to the activity and if I get it done I check the box, if not I cross it out and place it on the list for the next day. I always put the more important things first — waking up, yoga and coffee. The day has to start somehow. The rest of the list will read about doctor calls/appointments, jobs and emails, housework. . . the fun stuff.

Don’t just take my word for it, browse any section in a book store or library for time management. Most books regurgitate a demand for a daily task list. And honestly to-do lists are a way of how most business’ keep chaos out the way of the consumer — menus. Menus are not just kept at restaurants, any vendor has a complete menu or catalog of their goods or services — A community center having a list of activities and where to sign up — in list format. Lists can be used for any need or goal whether personal or business related.

Keeping a list may seem daunting, and it is. Only it is one of those daunting things that ends up creating fun; Time with your kids, or to read that favorite book, shopping for nothing — shoes, cooking instead of microwaving. Thinking of to-do lists as a way of centering your focus and not as another thing to do may be helpful.

Don’t forget to be spontaneous, however, a list is only there for convenience of timeline, reminders, and organization. Make an activities list and stick to it in a way that you are comfortable. Be as lose or as agile as you feel fit for your life. Sometimes I end up doing the complete opposite of I wrote down, or just none of it and get completely side tracked… I just keep going.

My lists can get quite long, but I get everything done, usually, and I have learned that it is OK to divert a little from the plan and not be hard on myself for it. Making lists for myself has not only trained me to complete goals in a timely manner, but it has also taught me patience — with myself and others, forgiveness, and the willingness to allow myself peace in time and control over my time.

It’s catching and addictive, My life partner is starting to make lists now too.

A Thought

images-35 (picture credit goes to pencil revolution) I wrote this last night for my friends and family on my Facebook. I wanted to share it and then expand a little.

“Time doesn’t stop, or stand still. Moments are pockets of time captured forever in your memory. Others will be involved without knowing, not remembering the same moment. Perceptions based upon these moments distorts reality, it’s the in-between where people believe the truth.

Truth–such a funny word. Yet it holds the holds of all one’s events and thoughts, a very serious action. Is it an action, truth? A noun, a thing?? Truth is one’s perception of what they want to hear, see, smell, touch… It is what one is willing to accept. Regardless if what you believe is true or not, by steering away from one’s own truth creates an unbalance of events. Life will become out-of-control, like an LSD trip. Unraveling like a ball of yarn and in the middle will escape a smaller version of yourself, rolling around waiting for the end–where will it dump you?

These are the elements Jim Morrison may have tripped about. Maybe not.”

  I am certainly feeling the need to write. I just don’t know where to start. I have so many thoughts and feelings streaming through me, they are too fast–my fingers just can’t keep up. It’s exhausting. But, this is why I must write. I have found myself in a new zone, but my mode is staying strong–it is not budging. However it’s molding so as to fit into the new space. Super difficult. I am finding myself having to stand up to or be against my own actions–hypocrite. I have to hide because of someone else–or rather I won’t change. And we’re not just talking about habits, it’s so much more, everything, how I see the world. All the ingredients to which the reason for the event to happen in the first place. I don’t feel like myself anymore, and I want to scream. Where is my looking mirror? I need The Voice to steer me back. How do I stand tall and express who I am without tainting the young in some way. What can I change without losing who I am? It’s Not that I am a bad human, but how do my actions and my morals, my perceptions stay in check as to not influence those around me–who are still growing, learning, becoming their own under someone else’s understanding. How do I love the man who sees the world differently than I do. Not even, how do I afford his mask that he wears during certain moments, at certain times, for certain reasons. Too many limitations for me I say–in the meantime I can’t help but feel his constraints. Yogi breaths, Yogi breaths…

Age is Time

Imagege is nothing more than a numbered point of time rendered upon humans in order to right-place him/her into a specific, limiting category.  Time defines age, and Americans are obsessed with both. Think about how everyday living is connected to and controlled by time. Let’s make a list: Jobs, kids, school, traffic, RX pick ups, appointments. . . How often in a day do you ask yourself what time it is and feel guilty because you are running late, or need to be doing something else? WE limit and restrain our lives with time, why? Control. One way we can control time is to control age.

Time will come and go no matter how much one may try to control it. Age is stamped, signed and sealed with a date and time. Celebrating this stamped occasion creates a sense of control over life and living. Each year a birthday happens and we bake a cake and open a present to celebrate time, a miracle. Miracles should be celebrated everyday, so really we should have cake everyday. How would America survive if Americans celebrate the moment, and not worry about the time? Would there be chaos? Image

Chaos is controlled by laws, supposedly. How many laws do we have that are connected to age: Drinking Laws, Driving Laws, Marriage Laws, Becoming an Adult Law — which means the government can start taxing you, Voting Laws, Gun Laws, Student Financial Aid Laws, etc. We stamp an age on “it” and “it” becomes the way we live. Who is to say what “it” is? Lawmakers.

Lawmakers break down our society into groups by age and then implement limits to what action is legal and acceptable by that age group. These groups are categorized by Old Age, Middle Age, Teenagers, and Children. It is really a simple form of agism in order for population control. When a stranger asks how old you are it is a form of discrimination. Immediately when the answer is given a sort of judgment is placed upon what that person can be limited to do, or not do — physically, mentally, and sexually.

Image Why did 40 yr old women coin the term, “40 is the new 30.” They are not ready to be thought of as middle aged. And why, because they are still young and vibrant — as much so as a 30 or even a 20 yr old woman. Women, and Men, want the choice to live their life at will. As it will soon be snuffed out because of their age, so they lie. Today’s demands do not match up with age limits. Let go of the categories.

Age is Time, and cannot be controlled. We should celebrate everyday as a miracle and allow it to come and go as it was meant to be. Don’t worry about how old you are, rather how you’re spending your time. You never know when that time will be taken. Remember, society is not the judge of how your time should be limited to its objectives. So go on lie about your age the number is irrelevant.

Image  Age is only a number, a number to count time. Instead of asking how old someone may be, ask them how they spend their time. You may be surprised at the outcome.